Blog (Page 42)

Adoption memoirs strongly draw me, primarily because of the elements of memoir and mystery that surround the story. Gloria Oren opens her story with photos of a deeply devoted and adoring set of parents. Descriptions of wonderful summers spent in Carmel, New York and visits to the boardwalk and merry-go-round on Coney Island follow. Their nurture shows in their small daughter’s glowing, confident countenance. In my heart, I celebrated her happy childhood.

But this stable, normal childhood abruptly transformed into one of mystery, confusion, and pain. One day while playing with friends, she found a note tucked in her mailbox. Gloria told them she’d be right back, then took the note to her mother. “What does it say, Mommy?”

Clearly her mom didn’t want to read it, yet she struggled with what to do. In time she told Gloria to sit down.

“The note says, ‘You’re an adopted brat,'” her mother told her.

Gloria was confused and puzzled, not understanding the words “adopted” or “brat.” Her mother explained both to her and told her she must never tell anyone she was adopted. Thus the dark aura of secrecy enveloped the child with the only information she’d ever receive from either parent.

Yet her happy childhood appeared to resume. She entered kindergarten, started tap dance lessons. visited historical places with her family, and adopted Scotty, a cocker spaniel. Photos show a growing, intelligent girl singing in a talent show and enjoying the playhouse her father and uncle built.

Then, on Gloria’s eleventh birthday, her father suddenly died. Her mother was so devastated she couldn’t be available for her daughter’s grief. Gloria became a latchkey child as her mother went to work. Parts of her young life became a foggy void.

In the years ahead, though, Gloria’s mother rallied for her daughter and focused on her bright child’s education. They moved to Israel. The Yom Kippur War of 1973 began and Gloria experienced the shocking death of a friend. She threw her efforts into caring for children in need. Following three years in Tel Aviv University, she learned she must enlist in the Israeli Armed Forces.

What was most striking for me, as I read through this memoir, was Gloria’s tenacity in facing her life’s challenges. As she met her future husband, her mother suddenly died and she was without family. She had also just lost the last person who knew any information about her real parents.

At age 23, Gloria married her love, Tuvia. During the time their children arrived, Gloria suffered illnesses and subsequently her sons did, too. She wondered about her true, biological relatives and if these problems linked to them.

Then Tuvia sought a position with Boeing and they moved to the states, where they welcomed their new daughter. Yet Gloria suffered further medical problems which eventually resulted in a cancer diagnosis. Following radiation and a slow recuperation, Gloria suffered more ill health and committed to finding her biological family. The remainder of the search and outcome resides in this book, which I strongly encourage you to read.

I admired Gloria’s journey through the dark and light times of her life. My deepest respect for her perseverance was when she climbed over each brick wall that sought to block her from ever finding her truth. You’ll want to find out what it was.